While pondering our March date, which has yet to be determined, I asked myself this question:   Why am I dating my wife, especially when she is soooo tired all the time?

Because if I dated another woman it would be extremely hard to explain.

Because dating her allows for minimal rejection – she won’t tell me she has other plans.

Because there is no other woman on the planet who deserves my full attention. Period.

Because it feels good to get in our car and back out of the driveway knowing wherever we go there will be no arguments erupting from the backseat about the ipad/pod.  (there’s a thought…maybe for our March date we should just drive around peacefully for hours.)

Because if, and when, our children get married, I want to have earned the privilege of sitting on the second row of the church while holding her hand during the wedding.

Because Family Systems is more than a Theory, and most likely, how Aly and I treat one another will be a key ingredient to the interaction between our children and their spouses.

Because when her eyes smile at me some of my insecurity is defeated.

Because she is curvy and smells nice.

Because “quality versus quantity” is bologna, and hours invested with each other make more difference than minutes.

Because when it came time to say “I do” twenty three years ago, I did.  And the vows said nothing conditional about receding hair or expanding waist (mine.  all mine.)

Because she tolerates my jokes.  And laughs every now and then.

Because everyone we know who has an empty nest tells us the view from the top of that mountain is worth the climb together.  Dating each other is part of that climb.

Because sitting in church on the same pew the Sunday morning after a Saturday night date is better than sex.  (In one sense.)

Because Merlot, cornmeal encrusted oysters on fried green tomatoes, and Crab stuffed Sea Bass are pre-requisites to conversations that CANNOT be had at home.

Because God said I should. Well, maybe not explicitly, but The Song of Solomon said something about walking across the Hills of Bether, and I think that is kinda about dating my wife.

Because sometimes there are problems in life that CAN be solved by dinner and a movie.

Because staying in love means playing the part, not just assuming the character.

Because our lives are too stressful to have no rewards.

11 thoughts on “Because…

  1. Yes, yes, yes! Dates matter even when we are (maybe most of all when we are) sooooo tired we can’t fathom having the energy to enjoy a fried green tomato. Here’s to dating (our spouses) in mid-life…

    • Chris, you drive a motorcycle and are married to your first wife, you work very, very well in a serving profession, and you are quite good at it. THAT is inspirational. And you drive a motorcycle…did I mention that?

  2. I love your date blogs. They make me happy for Allyson and you and your family. They make me sad because I never got the chance to stay married forever to one person. They make me laugh and they make me so happy Iknow you both. Marriage is a priviledge and a blessing. You give others hope, Kevin. I love you both

    • Mrs. Betty…you will always be “Mrs.” to me…even though each passing year brings our age gap closer, you will always be a “mom with the most” in my mind, and that makes me call you “Mrs.” Anyway, Betty – still feels funny – I am delighted that you are enjoying reading our blog. We will keep writing as best we can. This morning Alyson said, “I think for our date Saturday we should just go some where and stare at each other.” do you think that counts as a date? We are pegging the stress meter regarding money and kids and career right now, so doing nothing right now feels like a viable option.

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