I have a confession to make. This “year of dating” was totally Kev’s idea. He has the well deserved reputation in our family as the romantic, while I am the pragmatic (some would say grumpy) one. But he caught me at a weak moment. I was a captive audience during the drive to Charleston on January 3rd as we drove to see our friends for dinner. The conversation started something like this…..
Kev: “Why don’t we do something this year we have never done before, you know, have a goal, make a plan and accomplish it? So when we get to the end of the year we can say, “we did that!”
Aly: “We are sending a child to college this year! We’ve never done that before!”
Kev: (not really what he had in mind) “No, I mean something unique like not buying any new clothes for a whole year, walk from Greenville to Charleston as a family, renovate the house together, plan one awesome date a month. I dunno, we could really make it fun; something we would look forward to.”
Aly: (feeling tired already just thinking about it) “I am going to need some time to think about this.”
To be honest, the push and pull of married life, finances, work, children, grocery shopping, meal planning, meal making, meal cleaning, laundry and the like can take a toll on the romance and intimacy in a marriage. It is easy to put your spouse and time with on the back burner (or in the attic). It is easy to get into what I call “survival mode”… just doing the things that HAVE to be done to get through each day while not focusing on the things that SHOULD be done to add joy and strength to our marriage and life. We, or should I say “I”, often get it backwards – time with my spouse should be the first priority, not the last thing on the “to do” list.
So, I am all in even though I am responding contrary to my natural tendencies. I expect to be changed and challenged by this project. And, even if I am still tired, I can look forward to some awesome dates with my sweet, romantic, and ever patient hubby. Let the adventure begin….